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8 Reasons Guys Who Read Make the Best Boyfriends

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I don’t mean to sound like a terrible snob, but the question of what (and whether) a guy reads offers important clues into whether he’s boyfriend material or *cough* fuck-buddy material. If a guy claims to “never read,” the fact that he believes that’s something worth bragging about is highly suspect — since when is being smart not cool? If he says he loves to read but struggles to find the time, that, on the other hand, is commendably honest. Of course, if the guy says he loves to read, reads all the time, AND his taste in books overlaps with mine, well, then I swoon. Book wormy guys are my kryptonite.

Truly, though, what he reads matters less than the fact that he does. Here are 8 reasons why.

1. Because sticking to a book, even when it’s a struggle, shows he’s capable of commitment.

You can tell a lot about a person by how he reads. My ex-boyfriend was a terrific starter. Our first year together was the most romantic of my life — constant surprises, elaborate dates, love letters up the wazoo, rose petals leading from the elevator to our apartment door, etc. But after a while his efforts trickled off. I watched him apply the same initial energy to tons of projects — most of which he never finished.

He loved books — he loved buying them, talking about them, and starting them. The armrest of our couch always had a book tented over it. If you investigated our bookshelf, you’d notice bookmarks popping out of half the titles. I’d always been dismayed by how easily my ex abandoned books (even the most page-turnery things, like Harry Potter). I think I should have taken that bad habit as a sign.

“Where do you see us in six months?” I asked after five years of dating.

“I don’t know, babe!” he said, and kissed me on the head. End of conversation.

2. Because love letters, love letters, love letters. And emails, and texts.

Remember the play version of Cyrano de Bergerac, the story of the big-nosed courtesan who writes letters to Roxane on behalf of her inarticulate suitor Christian? Roxane falls in love with Christian because of the beauty of his letters, but later, when she finds out that Cyrano has been writing them all along, she realizes that he is her true love.

I have a sentimental habit of saving all the love letters written by boyfriends past. Every now and then, when I’m feeling nostalgic, I take out the ones written by an ex who was a seriously talented writer. It’s not because I miss him, but because the letters themselves were so beautiful. His writing vividly brings back the summer we road-tripped across the western United States in his dirty Volvo, the smell of Montana forest fires filling the car, that it’s like I’m there again.

He always credited his voracious reading for his writing skills — this article on Life Hacker backs him up. “I love you,” plain and simple, is a powerful phrase that doesn’t need much embroidery. But the better your guy is at expressing his reasons for love, via snail mail, text, or email, the happier you’ll be.

3. Because detailed, creative dirty talk can be a huge turn-on.

This goes hand-in-hand with reason No. 2. Dirty talk can be stressful. Sometimes it seems like there are three phrases, tops — especially when you’re in the sack and in that I-want-to-do-you-right-this-second frame of mind. But dirty talk can also be incredibly hot, especially when it gets creative. Reading improves your verbal abilities, and a guy’s way with words can be as impressive in the bedroom as a killer six-pack. If your guy is a reader, I bet he’s pretty good at whispering what he wants and how he wants it and exactly what he’d like to do to you.

If you’re not big on dirty talk, just think about it like this — every book he reads will make him a better communicator in general. And good communication is the secret to every successful relationship.

4. Because readers are adventurers.

I wrote about this a little bit in a previous post, but let me expand. That cheesy reading-is-a-journey metaphor has proved so durable because it’s true. Every time you open a book you take a trip — to a foreign country, another moment in history, even to someone else’s state of mind. A thirst for reading is the same thing as having a thirst for adventure. Every time he starts a new book, your guy proves that he’s down for something new, and that he wants to make his world bigger instead of smaller. Neuroscientists who conducted brain scans on readers noticed something fascinating — when people read scenes that are full of sensory detail (like the writing you find in novels), the same regions of the brain are activated as when people actually use their senses. Did your man just read a book about traveling to the Congo? He’s basically been there.

5. Because nothing brings you together like a book club for two.

According to Psychology Today, engaging in shared activities with your partner creates positive memories and strengthens your bond. (Not surprising, but it’s nice to have evidence.) No matter what you and your guy like to read, starting a book club for two is a great way to bring you closer. It might seem like you’re not really connecting when you’re snuggled on the couch reading the same book, but in fact, you’re creating the foundation for new conversations, inside jokes, and a bunch of shared references. Plus, you can learn a lot about each other by the way each of you reacts to certain scenes or characters — if you cry at the end of Anna Karenina and he throws the book at the wall, that’s the start of a dynamic conversation.

6. Because the book is always better than the movie.

It is. It always, always is. Do you really want to fight about that with your non-reader boyfriend over and over again? If you date a guy who’s read The Fault in Our Stars too, you can go over every variation between movie and book plotlines afterward.

7. Because the more he reads, the better he’ll listen.

I don’t know if Cornell football guy actually doesn’t know what a vegetarian is or if he just wasn’t listening, but after I explained that I didn’t eat meat and he suggested I have a BLT for dinner, I was a bit startled. We’ve all dated people whose gaze starts to wander if you begin a long story, or who are so intent on what they want to share that they completely gloss over everything you say. There is nothing worse than a guy who doesn’t pay attention — who doesn’t notice that you’re uncomfortable at a party, or freezing cold, or who claims to have bought you your favorite flower and then shows up with daisies, even though you’ve explained a thousand times that you love daffodils. Readers have good focusing skills. In order to follow a complicated plot or a theoretical argument, they have to read between the lines and pay attention to detail. Your boyfriend’s ability to detect nuances in novels and nonfiction will make him a better listener and better at reading your moods — tons of studies have proven that focused reading translates to higher empathy levels.

8. Because buying presents is hard.

The best part about dating a guy who leaves to read? No more panicking about buying him a present that he’ll love.

Book Review #320

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Hardcover, 368 pages
Published November 7th 2017 by Delacorte Press
Original Title: The Midnight Line
ISBN: 0399593489 (ISBN13: 9780399593482)
Edition Language: English
Series: Jack Reacher #22, Jack Reacher Chronological Order #22
This is one of the best Jack Reacher books ever. It’s not even in comparison to the last two so-so books. It is simply one of the best and has everything in it that has made us fall in love with Reacher and follow the 6’5″, 250 pound former military policeman who ambles across America with no real destination or goal in mind. He travels lightly with only a toothbrush and buys his clothes at thrift stores rather than launder him. He has that American wanderlust that has led to the settlement of our country.

Reacher wanders by a pawn shop in a small town in Wisconsin and notices a West Point Academy ring. What stands out is how small it is. It is a woman’s ring. Reacher knows what has gone into getting that ring and wonders what hard times have befallen a veteran that they would pawn a ring paid for in blood, sweat and tears. So he decides to find her and see if he can help. It’s as simple and complex as that.

He follows the ring through South Dakota and into the wilderness of Wyoming. He comes to a bump in the road called Mules Crossing that consists of a fireworks store and a flea market. Houses are 5-10 miles apart and people are isolated. They think nothing of driving an hour to get groceries. What really surprised me is that Child is an Englishman who now lives in NYC and yet he so perfectly captures that isolated life and geography of rural Wyoming that you would think he grew up there.

There are stories of veterans who return home from the Wars and how they are treated that would break your heart. Used and discarded to live a life of pain with little or no support, they struggle to maintain. They often feel like outsiders and end up in places so far off the map that it’s hard to find them. As Reacher is a vet, he understands the struggle and sets off on his mission- to find the owner of that ring who was desperate as to pawn her West Point ring.

This was really a touching book that just reminded me why I got hooked on this series in the first place. I read it in two days as I couldn’t put it down. This is a must read for fans and a book that can get you hooked if you haven’t read him before

Book Review #319

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Hardcover, 384 pages
                           Published September 5th 2017 by Grand Central Publishing

ISBN: 1478948515 (ISBN13: 9781478948513)
Edition Language: English
When I first heard about this book….I wanted it. I knew I had to read it. Social media fascinates and terrifies me in equal measure. I will try to get my hands on any book that has social media at the heart of it, and “Friend Request” fit the bill perfectly.

The book opens in 2016. Louise Williams is a single mother to four-year-old, Henry. It’s an ordinary day when Louise receives the email that will change her life. Henry is at her ex-husband, Sam’s house and she has spent the day working. At first she was a glad to see she had an email waiting. However, after opening it, she’d give anything to go back to the boredom she was feeling just minutes before. She reads….

“Maria Weston wants to be friends on Facebook”

Instantly, Louise feels like she can’t breathe, and her first instinct is to slam her laptop shut.

She feels that she must be mistaken, she MUST have read the email wrong or she’s seeing things. But when she opens her laptop again….it’s still there.

“Maria Weston wants to be friends on Facebook”

She has no idea who would play such a sick joke on her. She’s tempted to delete the message and the friend request. But another part of her is morbidly curious….and wants to know. Curiosity wins out and she hits ‘Confirm Request’.

It’s been 25 years since she’s seen the face staring at her from the Facebook profile picture.

She thinks of her comfortable life. Her little family…..just her and Henry. Is that comfortable life being threatened….because of a friend request? As she thinks of her life the same sentence keeps running through her head “Maria Weston wants to be friends with me”.

“But Maria Weston has been dead for more than twenty-five years”

We know there’s something that Louise feels guilty about, something to do with Maria that happened in High School in 1989.

“I’ve been a friend, a daughter, a wife, a mother. Yet all the time, in the back of my mind, this one unforgivable act has loomed – squashed, squeezed, parcelled, but always there”.

Is someone playing a joke on her? But who? Somebody from the upcoming school reunion? Or is it something more sinister? Could Maria possibly be alive? And what secrets is Louise keeping that she’s feeling so guilty about? What has she done?

Well…..I’m not going to tell you!

“Friend Request” was all that I was hoping for and more. Not just suspenseful, it also has great dialogue and the issues brought up are so relevant to what’s happening in the world today. Not just social media but also friendships, bullying, marriage, sex and more. The characters were very well-developed. I just loved little Henry. And I loved to hate bitchy Sophie Hannigan.

Social media really makes us all vulnerable. Sometimes just looking at someone’s Facebook page can bring back teenage feelings, insecurities from a time when all you wanted was to be liked. The constant pressure to fit in. The rumors that would spiral out of control. Everyone just wanted to go the good parties, hang out with the popular crowd. Not realizing how so much of it wouldn’t matter years later. I had a decent high school experience, though far from perfect. But I also saw things that I know must have really hurt people, and I can remember a few “Sophie’s”.

The story alternates between past and present. Back and forth between 2016 and 1989. Also interspersed throughout the novel are musings from an unknown source. This adds to the mystery. Leaving the reader to guess whose private thoughts they were. I wanted to know who it was. I had my guesses, but I wasn’t even close.

“What would life have been like if she’d made a different choice then, not just for her, but for everyone around her?”

The author really knows how to pump up the suspense and tension until your head is spinning, trying to figure out who is telling the truth….who to trust. With excellent twist and turns, especially in the second half of the book. The last few chapters so tense that there was no way you could have pried the book out of my hands. I was desperate to know what happened.

Not everyone is who or what they seem. Can we ever REALLY know anyone?

This was a well-written and fast-paced exciting read. A fantastic debut novel full of mystery and suspense, real world issues, and relatable characters. I thought the ending was surprising and satisfying. I can’t wait for more from Laura Marshall!

15 Things You’ll Understand If You Love Reading in Bed

When we say there’s no place like home, what we really mean is there’s no place to read like your bed. Whether it’s a lazy weekend or a late night turning pages, the coziest place to read is underneath the covers. Check out these hilarious images you’ll understand if your bed is your ideal reading spot.